The Future Is Here! (Guest Signage: Luisa Bonifacio!)

I remember when we thought the future would bring hover crafts and flying cars. But no one envisioned hovering people, with spraying capabilities no less. Due to advances at Columbia University, apparently that time has come.

Don't Drink the Water!

After observing this truck hawking "Healthy Water," I decided to investigate further. Turns out we have several options to avoid water's massive caloric count. Do your part. Stay healthy!

There's a Reason

Well of course they're on sale.

Doing Our Part

Within a day of calling out the local newsstand on their grammar, 

a retraction was issued, changing this...

...to this:

The other identical sign, literally ten feet away, 

remains unchanged: 

There's only so much we can do.

As a side note, the King Cigarette's "Push" sign (see above) is on the side of a large metal kiosk. It's not going anywhere, 

but I'm tempted to try.

As they point out, "Hey, you never know."

"It's the Most Wonderful Day of the Week!" (Guest Signage: Avalon Hoek Spaans!)

Is this the way the kids say "Wednesday" these days, or just a new day? Either way, I'm all for it. 

I Didn't Stutter!

Yet another business that is clearly concerned I might miss their ineptitude. 

On one side of the local newsstand, the failed verb tense mixes with 

odd spacing, selling the news, and whatever this thing is called "maga."

But for clarification, just walk around the way:

Thanks for clearing that up.

Internet Predators

I think I know what happened with the last person to hold this job.

Fine Print (Guest Signage: Darryl Bennett!)

Another case of management not having their act together.

Taking Healthy to New Levels

For those whose New Year's resolutions involved a change of diet, BSB brings you Revolution Nutritious Spectacular!
Definitely the most exciting menu category I've ever seen; it sounds like an exercise program, weight-loss diet, and Radio City Music Hall production had a baby.

Get a "Job"

I wonder if I have to "show up" and "do work."

And I know that Spanish grammar calls for question marks before and after queries, but I had no idea they doubled up on the quotation marks as well.

(As a favor to those without internet access, here's an approximate translation: Looking for a "Responsible" Worker )

Verbing Gets Dirty (Guest Posting Matthew Mazza!)

Okay, so employees, volunteers, parents, and children must wash, but what about the rest of us? 

All joking aside, wikipedia defines toileting as: "the act of assisting a dependent patient with his/her elimination needs."

Sounds like a good hand washing is in the cards.

Accentuate the Negative

I always say, if you're going to spell just one word wrong, make sure to highlight the error in all caps. Bonus points if that word is supposed to inspire our confidence in your abilities.

Low Standards

Our second food-employment situation this week. Luckily, recent studies show that over 60% of Americans are overqualified for this position.

Perhaps my favorite part is the idea of texting a resume. And yes, I did send mine (although Google questioned my sanity). Waiting for a reply...

BSB Fiscal Cliff Update (Guest Signage: Charles Gilbert!)

Thanks to Congress for averting the cliff. Who could have imagined that in just a couple of days unemployment would be so low that Dunkin' Donuts would resort to hiring food products.

Tipsy Times at the BSB

New Year's Resolution: Next year, sample the product after making the sign.