Choose Wisely

Since reading this I worry when I eat spinach that somewhere out in the world there is some poor sap waiting for me to finish so he can enjoy his bean curd.

Unless it literally means that the plants can't eat at the same time. In which case I need to rethink my understanding of plant biology.

Taking Healthy to New Levels

For those whose New Year's resolutions involved a change of diet, BSB brings you Revolution Nutritious Spectacular!
Definitely the most exciting menu category I've ever seen; it sounds like an exercise program, weight-loss diet, and Radio City Music Hall production had a baby.

Cookin' with Grass!

From the same people who gave us repetitive wontons and food finding challenges comes "plant fried rice" and strong, if ambiguously worded, ordering instructions.  

New Food Challenge: Chicken and Broccoli!

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To the growing list of internet food challenges - including the Milk Chugging Challenge and the Cinnamon Challenge - add this game of hide and seek from my local Chinese Restaurant.
(Warning: If you don't know what these challenges are, you might not enjoy the linked vids.)

(if you're liking the blog, hover over the like/share buttons and think about clicking them. You might be inspired. Thanks!)

Guest Signage Sunday! "It Runs in the Family"

In keeping with this week's Chinese takeout theme, comes an offering from the inspiration for my attention to odd signs, my mom.

Two possible explanations for the patheticism* of her local Chinese takeout's bags come to mind:

1. They want to stress that they only offer a certain level of customer service:

"We're not angry at you for shopping here. We might even have somewhat enjoyed our interaction. But we can't claim to reach Walmart-esque, Prozac-induced excitement about your patronage or the rest of your day.


Have a great one, if you like. Or a rotten one, it that better fits your mood. It's really all the same to us."


2. Or as my always optimistic mother opined"

"There's obviously an effort being made, but apparently it would cost too much to get the full smile."

Thanks for reading and have a _________ day.



*Coined, Nicholas Fernandez, 2001.

Same Soup, Different Day ("Thoughtless Food" Series #1)

Okay, I know it’s low-hanging fruit to pick on Chinese restaurants for spelling and grammar, but the “Lomein” in pic 2 is only the start….

My local Chinese takeout/buffet line restaurant had their “Grand Opening” for over a year-and-a-half before moving on to an identical sign, minus the opening announcement. That’s one hell of a coming out party, if you ask me. I guess it all depends on how long they plan on staying open. If they’re going to be around for a couple of centuries (like a dynasty), perhaps the year of “opening” is appropriate.

But even that’s not why this gem made the list. Instead, I’ve brought this sign to your attention for the tagline “We Change Some Items Daily.”

While I admire their honesty, I have questions:

How many days it takes for all the items to change?
How many days has that steamed dumpling been sitting on the buffet?
Was it originally steamed, or did it start as a raw dumpling, but after days of sitting untouched in the hot, clammy buffet environment become “steamed”?

Either way, I think I’m going elsewhere for lunch.

Finally, we have the “All-Day Special.” Aside from the shocking 10% markup, I have one thing to say:

If it happens all-day, every day, it’s not special. As Ben Gibbard says, “It’s not a party if it happens every night.”

Speaking of The Postal Service, a great memory of mine is when a girlfriend posed the seemingly innocent question “Have you heard of The Postal Service?”

Needless to say, I maintained my snobbish, unaware aura:

“Ummmm, yeah. The rain, sleet, hail, snow people. I think we’re all familiar.”